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Let me make one thing clear. Robin is not the mother. I can't believe how many people out there are so convinced that the mother is Robin, still. They have made it clear from the beginning that it isn't Robin. There are many examples of why she isn't, but I'll address the situation with one main point that will put the Robin-Ted fans to rest. In the Pilot episode, Older Ted says to his children "And that's how I met your Aunt Robin." Why would the kids call Robin "Aunt Robin"? There is no explanation that makes sense whatsoever for that. So just take a rest and I'm sorry to hurt your dreams of a Ted-Robin marriage.
I'm going to start off by saying that it's completely unfair to judge how the mother is going to be when there was simply one line spoken. But with that said I'm going to unjustifiably complain. The problem here, is that Ted has dated some smokeshows in his lifetime. When Cristin Milioti showed up, the first thing I thought of was "Well that's certainly not going to make Victoria, Stella, Zoey, and Robin jealous." Also, she's Rachel Bilson's roommate, who revealed to Ted that everyone was choosing her roommate over her. Um, who would choose Milioti over Bilson? Despite the fact that Bilson's character is a lesbian, I'm calling out the show on that one.
Well it's fair to say I'm not a fan of the casting choice, and I hope that I'm proven wrong during Season 9. Without further ado, here is the Top 10 actresses presented in reverse order that should've been chosen over Cristin Milioti:
Weren't quite worthy of a write up (also known as "Honorable Mention", I suppose)-
Zoey Deschanel (locked into New Girl)
Anne Hathaway (no one likes her)
Ellen Page (too young looking)
10) Kristen Bell
9) Jennifer Lawrence
I
know. It'd be ridiculous. But it would be even more ridiculous to make a
Top 10 Actresses list for anything right now and not include her. She's the best
in the business. People who want to make the "she's too young"
argument clearly didn't see Silver Linings Playbook, in which she
played a widow who is experiencing some mental illness and plays a character well beyond her years. She is great.
That's all there is. And come on, how great would interviews be with her
and Neil Patrick Harris. Any kind of Lawrence interview I'm a fan of,
but add NPH in there and you've got yourself a stellar press tour.
Obviously this would never work out, but I just didn't want to have to
convince myself not to have J-Law on here. She can do anything she
wants. 8) Amy Ryan
First things first. She's a blonde. I know. Dye her hair brown and get her in. Amy Ryan is one of Hollywood's most underrated actresses. She would be too good not to have. She was amazing in Gone Baby Gone. And as her time on The Office has now ended, she could be on TV again without confusing roles. I'm a huge fan. She would be a much better option for the wife than Milioti. As you can tell, I'm not a fan. And it disappointed me greatly. Anyways. Moving right along.
7) Rooney or Kate Mara
I know this is kind of a cop-out. I put two people for this. I get it. They're sisters. Pick which one you like better and go. The reason why I listed both of them, instead of just one, is because both are locked into projects long term and more than likely would never be able to have the time for How I Met Your Mother anyway. I really enjoy sibling actors because one is usually so much better than the other, and I feel the need to mention that as much as possible (this is not the case with the Mara's). Kate Mara impressed me in the films 127 Hours and Shooter, and then when I binge watched House of Cards, I officially hopped aboard the Kate Mara bandwagon. Rooney would give a better performance, and I could definitely see her as the mother, I just see Kate fitting the character better. Plus, Kate is older and looks more like a mother and also has worked with Radnor on Happythankyoumoreplease. But pick your poison here, both are deserving and both would have been great.
6) Rachel Weisz
The interesting thing that could involve Weisz is her odd resemblance to Robin. There could be a funny episode where they discuss how Ted just found a girl that looks like Robin to fill the void. It would have been appealing. Also, Weisz is very attractive and can play the role of a mother. There definitely wouldn't be any issue establishing her character traits, as she easily could pass as a musician. I don't see many problems with Weisz, besides that she may look TOO old for the group.
5) Brittany Snow
Until Pitch Perfect, I would have never considered her for this list. But in that movie, she proved she can be odd, funny and different from her past roles. In theory, she would never work, as she just signed on to do a show for Fox. But I'm free to wonder what she would have been like as Ted's wife. A problem with Snow would be that she doesn't look like a mother. Not that she's too young, it's just that she's at a point in her career where she's still playing high school and college students, which is too young to be the mother. I think she would have gotten along with Lily perfectly, and I could see a storyline involving the tension between her and Robin. Which of course would then build up to a beautiful moment where Robin and Snow would have to work together and bond. Sidebar, 'Robin and Snow' sounds like a Disney film that never got made. Get on that.
4) Missy Peregrym
I'm
never too big a fan of when actresses do more than one TV show at the
same time, but this is too perfect of a fit. She's gorgeous, she kicks
ass. She's Canadian so the writers can have some fun with that. She is
fantastic in Rookie Blue, and she also was fantastic in what most people
know her from, which is the film Stick It. She also appeared in a few episodes
of Heroes, you know, back when Heroes was awesome and still existed. I'm a huge fan and I
think she'd be perfect as Ted's wife. Her humor would make all of the jokes hit that are written for her. She would fit in the group extremely well. She would be able to party with Barney and Robin for sure. She's definitely not boring, like Milioti seems to be. At this point in the list, I
would be overjoyed with these top 4 actresses.3) Emma Stone
First and foremost she'd need to dye her hair to be a brunette, reflecting her appearance in Zombieland. Emma Stone's personality fits the mold of the group. She easily could play along to the sexual jokes and keep up with Robin and Barney. She would be hilarious, and most of all she'd be a good fit for Ted. The problem here is getting Emma Stone attached to a sitcom like this. Granted, Jason Segal would still be the biggest star on the show, and a theory I have about why they went with a no name for the mother is due to the fact that Season 9 of How I Met Your Mother almost didn't exist due to funding. Segal and the cast demanded more money as well as the fact that it'd be more time they would give up, taking away from Segal's film projects. I could see this being a problem with Stone, but of course this whole blog is hypothetical anyways. Stone's personality makes her a perfect match not just for Ted, but for the show.
2) Isla Fisher
I'll
admit, in theory it seems like this choice makes zero sense. But she is quirky and cute,
but also sexy. If Ted married Isla Fisher, she definitely would be the
sexiest girl Ted ever dated. It would be good for Lily, too, adding
another redhead to the group. I think my choice of Fisher is impacted
mostly by her character in the film Definitely, Maybe. If I had to hand
pick any character from any show, or film, for Ted to marry, it'd be
April played by Fisher in Definitely, Maybe. The problem is, it's a
fictional character. Not who she is. Which is one of the only reasons
why Fisher is not in the top spot. An argument that was presented to me
by a friend of mine when I proposed Fisher as a casting choice, was that
she's too old. Well fun fact here: Isla Fisher is younger than Josh
Radnor. So that argument's out. Her humor that she shows in the film Wedding Crashers reminds me a lot of Lily's humor and she would add an interesting dynamic to the group. Oh, and she'd be good for Ted too, which is kind of the whole point here.1) Anna Kendrick
She's awesome. There's no getting around that. She's a much cuter, prettier version of Cristin Milioti. She's also experienced in acting and wouldn't trip up the plot points like I'm afraid Milioti will. She just got done shooting a ton of films and more than likely has a few open weeks on her plate right now. I don't know when they're planning on shooting, but I'm sure if Kendrick was available they would've loved to have her on set. She is very diverse and can do a bunch of different kind of acting. If I were to hand pick one of her roles to be the character of the mother, it'd be her role as the psychiatrist in 50/50. Quirky, cute, and would make Ted's past girlfriends jealous. Which certainly is the goal. She's beautiful and adorable, but she can party, too. She has an edge to her and she's hilarious. I cannot endorse Kendrick enough. She would've been fantastic. Any of these actresses would've been. You can follow Will Harmon on Twitter at @willharmon8
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